Sometimes you have to live off the fat of the land. When there isn’t enough fat to live off, maybe you can snack off the fat of the land until you are somewhat full.

Look for free samples. In my neighborhood we have this very fancy and super annoying food store called Union Market where they always have stuff out for tasting. Every day they have tiny cubes of cheese (usually 2 varieties!), olives, & little pieces of bread with olive oil to dip the bread in. BOOM! You just went from being hungry to enjoying a stand-up French picnic.

You will have to get over the potential embarrassment inherent to eating a lot of free samples. Here’s a few tips on that:

1) MAKE YOUR ROUNDS. Eat a few bites of cheese, then make your way over to the next freebies, etc… then come back to the delicious cheese.

2) YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Trust, anyone who’s ever worked at retail knows that “the public” is full of crazies. You are not the only one who is eating lots of free samples.

3) SIN BOLDLY… as Martin Luther once said. Free food isn’t any fun if you’re gonna stress about being that guy/girl who’s taking advantage of the system. If it helps, bring a friend to the picnic.

4) KNOW THYSELF / WASH THYSELF. If you’re dressed a little bummy or rocking some body funk, go to a bigger store where you are less likely to be harassed. In NYC, other sweet spots for free samples include Fairway, Trader Joes, & Whole Foods.

Good hunting,

= baje